May 28, 2019
Do you remember dreaming about what your first job would be after college? Maybe you pictured yourself putting on business clothes every day, sitting in creative brainstorming meetings and-arguably the best part when you're a broke college student-finally getting an adult paycheck. I know I sure did. Unfortunately, that wasn't what happened-not even close. My first job after graduating was as an advertising coordinator at a local newspaper in Nashville, TN. I was so excited about this position. From the name alone, I thought it sounded perfect for me. I envisioned myself working across every department and helping them come up with creative ways to market their messages. Well, it wasn't long before my little fantasy was crushed. Turns out that "advertising coordinator" was really just a fancy title for data entry. I spent my days inputting data into a decades-old software program that crashed every few hours. Every day, I walked into a gray cinder block building with gray walls, gray ceilings, gray cubicles and fluorescent lights. I died a little inside every day I worked there. It was a mind-numbing, miserable job for someone like me-creative, energetic and a people-person. But the problem wasn't only that the job made me miserable. I couldn't be myself. I wasn't doing something I was good at. I wasn't in a position that made me come alive, gave me energy, or brought me joy. I wasn't even using my strengths or talents. I wasn't being me. Related: Recognizing Your Gifts Have you ever felt that way? Have you ever been in situations, gone through seasons, or even spent years feeling like you lost yourself? Feeling like you didn't even recognize who you were anymore? I meet so many women who feel like they've gotten lost in motherhood, their careers or in other people's expectations of them. That last one-other people's expectations-reminds me of a fascinating book called The Top Five Regrets of the Dying by Bronnie Ware. Bronnie spent years working in palliative care. During her time caring for the terminally ill, Bronnie wrote a blog that later became a book about the most common regrets of the people she cared for. The number one regret was having worked too much. But the second one really surprised me. It was not having lived a life that was true to themselves. What Bronnie learned is so important. It's an opportunity for us to adjust our perspective and start making choices today that will help us avoid that same regret. Because a life well-lived is one where we live as our truest selves. Women often tell me they've lived for other people for so long they don't even know what they want anymore. Even worse, they don't even know who they are anymore. If this is you today, I want to encourage you: You don't have to stay there and wonder who you are or where "the real you" went. I want to give you five questions you can ask yourself that will help you get back to you. Consider them road signs to point you in the right direction. Related: Push Forward and Get Unstuck Five Questions to Help You Discover Your True Self 1. What do you want? Don't ask yourself what your spouse wants, what your kids need, or what all your friends think you should do. Ask yourself what you want. That's a tough question to answer because we so often consider our own desires to be selfish. But the truth is that the desires of your heart are not bad things. They are God things. In fact, Jesus asked this same question. A blind man once approached Jesus asking for mercy. Jesus responded by asking him, "What do you want me to do for you?" (Luke 18:41 NIV). Don't you think Jesus knew what this blind man wanted? Jesus didn't need the blind man to tell him, but I believe Jesus wanted to draw out those desires in him. And He wants to do the same for you. 2.Where do you want to be? If you don't know where you're going, you're never going to get there. That's why...
May 14, 2019
Several years ago, I met someone I've admired from afar for years. I was on the road for the spring Business Boutique event in 2016, and we had booked someone who I consider to be a mega-celebrity speaker: Christine Caine. I couldn't believe I was going to meet her in person and share a stage with her. I would have been grateful simply for the privilege of shaking hands, taking pictures, and hanging out with her. It felt like a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. But it was even better than that. We became friends in real life. The following year, she even invited me to speak on her conference tour, Propel Women. Of course, I agreed. We traveled around the country and spoke at six different events. And this relationship has only continued to grow. She was one of the first people I texted when I found out I was having a baby girl. And she is someone who I continually lean on for mentorship and guidance. Christine is just one example of the many incredible people I've had the privilege of building relationships with through Business Boutique over the last five years. Not only have these connections benefited my personal life, but they've also helped my business as well. It's true what they say: "It's all about who you know." The quality of your life is a direct reflection of the quality of your relationships. The same is true in business. The quality of your business is a direct reflection of the quality of your relationships. Every opportunity that you will ever have in your lifetime will come through people. So regardless of what type of business you're in, you're in the people business. Related: Building Business Relationships That's why I want to help you with something that many people find intimidating: networking. I meet so many women who are terrified of it. They often feel like making new connections is only for outgoing personalities. But I don't believe that to be true. So today, I want to bust three myths we believe about networking so you can stop believing these lies and take advantage of all it has to offer. Three Myths We Believe About Networking Myth #1: There's only one way to do it. When you think about networking, you probably picture talking to strangers at a formal event and a lot of awkward interactions. It's no wonder you want no part of it! But do you know what networking really is? Meeting people and making connections. That's it. It's really that simple. And you can build relationships with people anywhere and at any time. I'd be willing to bet you're already doing this every single day. As women, we're naturally relational and enjoy connecting with new people. It's what we do. You don't need to have a pitch or an agenda or be in a formal setting to meet someone new. Stop thinking about networking as anything more than making a new friend. Related: 4 Friends You Need for Your Business Myth #2: You have to be extroverted. Introverts might experience more anxiety when walking into a roomful of people, but they actually have the advantage. Why? Because introverts are gifted at connecting one-on-one and building deep, quality relationships. They may not want to work the room or be the life of the party, but they're going to walk out of there with at least one real connection. Here's a tip for you introverts: Start small. Scan the room and see if you can find just one person who looks inviting (bonus points if they're also alone). Walk up to them and introduce yourself. I guarantee that anyone in that room who is standing by themselves will welcome a friendly face because they're probably feeling exactly how you are. Keep in mind that this doesn't have to only be in-person. You can make connections online. For introverts, it's a great way to get out of your shell and get some practice under your belt. Myth #3: You'll come off as self-seeking. We all have this fear that people will think we have an agenda or we're...